~ Albert Schweitzer
"Affirmation of life is the spiritual act by which man ceases to live unreflectively and begins to devote himself to his life with reverence in order to raise it to its true value."
~ Albert Schweitzer
MEDITATION: 15 JANUARY
"When nobody around you seems to measure up, it's time to check your yardstick."
~ Bill Lemley
Picture the perfect life, the perfect family, the perfect relationship, the perfect recovery, and you've drawn a seductive and sometimes deadly delusion. We all know couples who don't dare voice their reality, or authentically state fears and negativity, afraid it will spoil the illusion of perfection. As if anyone else really cares whether they're perfect! The relationships people care about are the meaningful ones they share. Those seemingly flawless relationships can feel disengaged and sterile. Outsiders might smile and say, "Oh, that's nice." But there's no personal meaning.
Our society celebrates the perfect score, the record-breakers, the famous. Other societies have different perfection paradigms--their ideal beauty, their worthiest royalty or shamans. Clearly, "perfection" is relative, and not only geographically but temporally: The "perfect" grades or "perfect" game that appears ideal at one moment might be revealed as misinformed learning or mediocre effort the next moment.
We can apply this relativity of perfection to our own accomplishments and struggles. We don't have to let the dominant narrative define us. Societal standards can be a blessing, guiding us to excellence, or a burden that crushes individuality. Indeed, the quest for perfection has led to wonderful achievements. The art is to seek excellence while avoiding submission to perfectionism.
Healthy perfection relies on humanity and humility. It invites meaning and connection. If life goes wrong, the antidote is not to make it "better," and certainly, not "perfect," but to make it fuller of meaning. Every failure to meet expectations has value because relationships are a self-renewing process. This isn't the win-lose mentality of power over people, it's power with people. Here, progressis perfection.
DAILY HEALTHY ACTS
CHS - Los Angeles
Hedy has worked 30 years with individuals and couples, helping them overcome barriers to achieving the life they want to live.